Saturday 13 December 2008

Repentance- And a Promise

This blogger is sorry to admit, he comes as penitent before the world.

It has indeed happened in my life, on numerous occasions, that I have made commitments to members of the opposite sex.
I have promised to be exclusively faithful to them. I have made statements to them implying I wanted to spend my life with them, never look at another women and be sexually faithful to them.

I have done this more than once.

In my defence, I will only say, I never actually did any of these things. I never actually demeaned myself by keeping to these commitments.

But I confess in full, to degrading my dignity as a freeborn human being by bowing down to the slavecreed of monogamy and by saying with my lips, that which I did not feel in my heart. I had not the guts to defend the freedom of my body and my mind.
For that cowardice, I apologise.

I acknowledge my lack of moral fibre in allowing myself to apostasise on the freedom of my person in this way, in acknowledging by my words the right of one human being to expect exclusive chastity of another.

I hang my head in shame at ever having promised commitment of fidelity and chastity.
I admit it was unworthy of me and a thorough degradation of my dignity. I feel, even now, the thorough humiliation that I allowed my good name as a male slut to be degraded by anyone thinking I was a faithful monogamist who would ever settle down and commit. Most of all, I apologise to my friends and family for the times when they have no doubt been worried sick that I had actually converted to Monogamy. I apologise for putting you through that, I will never alarm you like that again.

I hereby promise in front of you all, never again to break a monogamous commitment of fidelity and chastity.
I promise never to make such a commitment.

I hereby swear never to degrade my dignity as a human being and submit to an exclusive commitment I would abhor any other human being making.

I hereby solemn swear that not only will I never belong exclusively to one person, I will never degrade my dignity by uttering words that debase my right to love freely, without bond.

You have my word on that.


Anonymous said...

Hahah. Thanks for the chuckle :)

Anonymous said...

You're completely loony.

Anonymous said...

On this issue I would have to agree with La Femme, gloriously loony.

Anonymous said...

Kate- I was in one of those moods...

La Femme, Gingatao- Gloriously over the top in my statement, yes.

But I kind of feel that it's kind of pointless being prissy with my attempts to undermine the values of chastity and monogamy if I then try go round trying to apologise for not being mongamous.
I don't apologise at all. I don't think there's anything to apologise for.

I think in fact, I should RECEIVE apologies from all those women who EXPECTED me to be. Because it wasn't natural, it was an intrusion of my civil liberties, and I'm not remotely sorry I failed.

Monogamy is one of those things that succeeding at, doesn't make you a better person.
Because there is no POINT in succeeding at it.

Yes, i'm being over the top and flippant in this response.

It was a flippant, over the top post that seemed amusing when the idea hit me as I was just drifting off to sleep last night.

I knew I was going to post the post above, because I'd already written it, I just thought this would be an amusing trailer.

It's said flippantly, but it does reflect my attitude on it.

Anonymous said...

Crushed, Less of the “degradation” of your dignity. What about the abuse of their trust?

To do that is basically dishonest.

As for your mealy mouthed self justification that ” I think in fact, I should RECEIVE apologies from all those women who EXPECTED me to be”. What absolute rubbish! You knew what they would think. You a salesman FGS. No excuses.

If you give the impression you will be/are something… anything really, then you should not be surprised if people take you at your word, believe the impression you give. You know that too don’t you?

Sadly from your tone in the post you are not actually sorry for it, but maybe it is difficult for you to say/admit, maybe I should give you the benefit of the doubt that this post as being as near an expression of regret as you can manage.

A relationship to be a “relationship” needs trust and care and consideration. I figure from what you say you never showed these or maybe even intended to. No credit to you for that.

Please, tell me I am wrong…

Anonymous said...

Moggs, I suppose the only way to explain it, we're human.

Let's face it, women are amazing things, really. You can't help but find something to love in most of them. And you have a habit of being able to get to us in certain moments where we kind of think 'I want to make her happy'.
And at this moment we feel altruistic and we ignore the emporical evidence which has temporarily been forgotten, that the words you utter when feeling all loved up will come back to haunt you.

I think the problem is, like any salesman, I believe this crap about wanting to be with someone forever whilst I spout it, but if it gets to be put to the test, I realise like hell do I. Or not in the way it comes across. I think once I get people in my life, in a sense I don't want to lose them from it, if I like them. Problem is I then make stupid promises and find the actual reality of what such promises mean, isn't something I want to have in my life at all.

I think the problem is, to me it really is just a bit of fun. To me it comes firmly under the category of 'leisure activities' and I just can't really see why people take it so seriously or what all the fuss is about.

The post is flippant, yes, it's me being devil's advocate, I'm trying to show the flip side of the equation is.

The problem is, as I say in the NATURE of the situation.
One close female friend of mine noted that I'm highly caring, considerate and trusting with my friends, but tend to be a bit of a bastard in my 'relationships'.

I point out that the general nature of friendships creates a situation in which I'm comfortable and if 'relationships' followed the same rules, everything would be OK. But simply being in a situation that makes me deeply uncomfortable brings out the worst in me, I think.

Anonymous said...

Crushed, If you know you have a tendency to walk of cliffs then maybe you ought be extra vigilant when you are near the edge of Beachy Head. I figure it might save you save you a world of hurt. I figure it might save the girl concerned a world of hurt also.

Did you ever think maybe you have a duty not to hurt deliberately? Even by omission when you know it is likely to happen.

I still think you see things weirdly with all this monogamy = ownership rubbish.

Oh and keeping tabs? Maybe it is making sure you are ok, knowing when to expect someone, knowing where they are, means you don’t have to worry so much about them getting run over, means being able to fit in with their plans.

I trust, foolishly sometimes, from experience. That's why I like to know stuff like that.

Anonymous said...

You were born into a society enslaved by illusions. You can't be blamed for wanting or needing to participate by catering to another's delusion. You're a social creature. There's no shame in being seduced into playing along.