Monday 5 January 2009

In Homage to Black Women

Well, most of you thought it was wrong we executed Saddam.
By 26 to 12.

Now to this week's issue.

And no, it's not political.
Only it is.

And it concerns what I believe to be a curious example of where I think people TRY to be politically correct when it suits them, ignoring their fallacious logic.

And it concerns a matter of aesthetics. Sexual attraction, in this case.

Generally speaking, I find black women more sexually attractive than white women. That's not to say I don't find white women sexually attractive. It's just that I find myself sexually attracted to a far higher proportion of black women than white women. And if you ask me to conjure up in my head my ideal woman, aesthetically, she's petite, slender and VERY black.

Now I've been told on some occasions, that there is something racist about this.

I can't help feeling that the logic here is inherently flawed.

Does the fact I prefer women to men, from a sexual point of view, make me a homophobe? Or sexist?
Clearly not.
So why should the fact that I am generally more sexually attracted to black women than white women make me racist?

The response is kneejerk and unthinking. Because, actually, this is one area where it is perfectly LEGITIMATE for me to have a preference in skin colour.

No one bats an eyelid when a man says he prefers blondes to brunettes. If someone was stupid enough to make hair colour the basis on which he chose to employ someone, it would be wrong. But being attracted to blondes rather than brunettes? Is that discrimination?

It's ok to say 'I prefer redheads'.

And it's ok to say 'I prefer the larger lady'.

And it's ok for a woman to judge a man by physique and say openly that she only goes for muscular men.

Now in terms of making a judgement on someone's intelligence or capacity to do a job, judging by skin colour is wrong. But there is one area in which the there is an obvious difference between black people and white people. They LOOK different. So in judging by looks, one is entitled surely, to have a preference. I can't see exactly HOW racism comes into being a white male whose sexual preference is for black women.

It simply happens to be my overall experience that I find a higher proportion of black women sexually attractive.

In fact, personally, I see it as being more natural, in as much as anything is natural. I'm not saying there is anything WRONG in prefering your own skin colour, any more than there is anything wrong in prefering your own sex. But I think there is a powerful biological urge in being attracted to different skin colours to your own. And I think more people are than care to admit to it.

I suppose I have to be honest and admit that generally, I just don't find white women sexually attractive in the same way I find black women attractive. Is this because black PEOPLE are more sexually attractive?
I think, to me, yes. I think it is true that colour plays a powerful role in my idea of what I find aesthetically attractive. I find the black form aesthetically and sexually more attractive. I don't know whether it is in fact so, or whether it is merely because I'm white I think that.

But certainly, I do seem to prefer the idea of mixed race couples. Something in my aesthetic sentiment seems to think that white guys should go with black girls, and black guys with white girls.
And we should all be making coffee coloured babies.

I certainly find that I don't find the idea of people of the same race having sex particularly turns me on. About as much as people of the same sex, if I'm honest.

And whilst I clearly DO go with white women, I do sometimes think it's often because I live in a country where there just happen to be significantly more white women. They're THERE. But I don't think I've ever turned down an opportunity to go with a black girl.
And ideally, if I settle down one day, I want to be rearing coffee coloured babies.

My ideal woman is black.
Slender, dark limbs.

Is this wrong?

Is it wrong to be more sexually attracted to people of one colour than another?

Poll's in the sidebar

Have your say!


Anonymous said...

I guess I just have more of a problem with the language of your question-- "on the basis of their skin colour"-- it sounds more deterministic than I think you intended. It isn't *just* because they are Black that you are attracted to them, is it?

But the idea of you being more attracted to a certain ethnicity than another? I don't think so. I think when it is based on racist assumptions that it is problematic (e.g., White men who don't like Asian women because they are often very beautiful, but because they expect them to be subservient), but this doesn't seem to be the case with you.

Anonymous said...

Hi Crushed!
I see your comments on E-K's blog sometimes. I decided to come visit. Aren't you an interesting boy?
I think it is nobody's business what your preferences are. Go after whatever traits please you. You are right, life is too short. Mixed race babies are beautiful. (Not that unmixed aren't.) Good luck in your quest fine sir...Tally-Ho!

Anonymous said...

Btw...I forgot to say...
If those are your eyes just above the sex t-shirt in your sidebar...They're beautiful. I'm not just saying that. Very much like my Mr. Cheeks. Totally sexy.
Okay...I'm done now. :)

Anonymous said...

What colour brain do you prefer your women to have?

Just a thought. x

Anonymous said...

Skin color makes no difference at all to me, but I do like long hair that is relatively straight or with slight waves. I do like dark hair best, but I certainly appreciate blond and red hair. A lot of different women are very attractive. Much depends, after that first glance, on what they find intersting to talk about

Anonymous said...

Hmm. Well, we're all the same when the lights are off, as someone once said to me.

Personally, I think skin colour is just another criteria for attraction. There's nothing wrong with that. You're not actively saying "I only choose black girls". It's a physical attraction thing, something you can't really control.

Personally, I think the whole politically correct thing goes too far. That actually comes from 1984 doesn't it? Where you have to agree with what the government tells you. I think the Chinese revolutionaries used that term as well.

It isn't wrong to genuinely prefer one hair colour over another, or one skin colour over another, or one gender over the other.

I see this in black and white terms (no pun intended). It's not wrong to choose.

Anonymous said...

Re the Saddam poll, I for one think he deserved what he got. The atrocities this mad man committed are clearly ghastly. Not advocating capital punishment as innocents have been put to death before, I just can't help think executions are legalised murder, he still deserved it.
As for you personal preference , I don't see it as racist that you prefer black women to white women. Am I racist because I prefer white men to black men? No. It all comes down to your own personal choice and people need to be mindful of that with respect.

Anonymous said...

Crushed, I guess we all find some things more attractive than others. Different things, If not we would all be chasing the same people ^_^.

You just happen to find dark skin and maybe some other characteristics particularly attractive. Legs? Boobs? Ass? we discussed some of your other buttons.

Some of what we like I figure has got to be almost hardwired. Like things that indicate the prime of reproductive health. So good teeth, glossy hair, smooth skin, Child bearing hips in women plus obvious suckling equipment, etc.

Some of what we find attractive may be fixed or modified due to accidental conditioning or association, from things like first sexual experiences and other good or bad experiences.

You just happen to have got yourself a particular combination crush. No biggie. Not super significant, except to you I guess ^_^

You don't have to justify it, but I don't think you should be thinking of it particularly in terms of race either.

Anonymous said...

I confess to having the hots for Diane Modahl. And two of the women you feature here I find highly physically attractive. I don't know what their personalities are like - that's most important in any woman.

When I was single I was open minded about who would suit me - beggers can't be choosers, after all !

Anonymous said...

Princess P- It depends on what you mean by 'just' because they're black.

I clearly find darker skin more attractive and I think if you were to show me two women who were basically aesthetically identical, but one was black and the other white, I'd find the darker girl more attractive.

Often Asian women in this country are attracted to white men partly because they sometimes feel, rightly or wrongly, that they will escape cultural expectations. I think that's a pity in some ways, thoigh obv good in the sense it breaks down cultural boundaries.

In cultural terms, I think black women, especially black African women are often more up front and direct. They tend to be quite up front, which is quite refreshing. They don't play games so much. Just my experience.

Sweet Cheeks- I guess I'm not exactly strait laced, no...
People seem to find me either fascinating or shocking.
As I say, 'If you love me, I love you, if you don't, not my fault you have bad taste...'

They are my eyes, yes :)
I'm often told they're my best feature.

I've been mugged- Well, I know we can all say looks don't matter. But they do. There has to be an attraction on a chemical level.

This might be unfair. But it's true. Sorry to get all Shallow Hal, but certain things are biological responses.

Charles- A lot of different women are attractive, yes.
I mean, I can think of many white women I think are stunning; Liz Hurley, Shirley Manson, Gillian Anderson, etc.

Looks of course, only attract us in the first place. But we have to at least be amenable to looking further. If someone is ugly inside, we'll soon know. But there has to be something make us look in the first place.

But of course, to last, a true intellectual connection is necessary.

Akai- It is just a criteria for attraction.
I think probably, there is something in the fact that my genes are seeking widely different genes, we're often attracted to opposites. though oddly, when it comes to physique, I actually seem to prefer women with similar physiques to my own- petite, basically.

I just find I get a lot moxe sexually stimulated by darker skin.

Nunyaa- Legalised murder, that's how I see it. It's eye for an eye justice, which is barbaric.

Yes, I think its a personal prefernce. Like with sexuality.

Moggs- I'm definitely more of an ass man. Indeed, most people would say my preference boobs wise is slightly flat chested. I'm not into the buxom type.

Hey, I'm not sure why I find the women attractive that I do. The girl I lost my virginity to was blonde and buxom, but it didn't mean I ended up fixed on that.

My first love was brunette and very petite.

I think I first discovered my preference for the darker lady in my early twenties.

E-K- Yes, she has a certain something...

I think I tend to find that when you're talking HIGHLY physically attractive, for me anyway, chances are she's black.

Of course personality matters, as I said above. At least, it does long term. But sometimes, it IS all just about sex.

And in a long term situation, SOME of it is STILL about sex.
So it surely helps if the chemistry exists...

When you're single, you're always a chooser and never a begger :)
It's when you're attached you find you have no choice BUT to beg...

Anonymous said...

eh, all is fair in love & lust i suppose. I mean one canot control what one fancied right?

But I think there has to do more than just the color of their skin - often every etnicity has a different bone structure, skin, hair, features, you name it!

I often envy my darker sistahs of their wonderful lovely skin, their lovely features and high cheekbones & full lips.

But once again, beauty comes in many forms and is in the eye of the beholder.

Anonymous said...

Hi Crushed, thanks for the greeting happy new year!

Anonymous said...

"When you're single, you're always a chooser and never a begger :)"

Poor deluded boy...