Haydee

I'm not doing a long post tonight.

Had a crap day.
And I'd rather talk to Haydee than post.

It makes me feel better.

I really do have nothing at all I can ever possibly offer her.

Nothing whatsoever.

I can't offer her financial stability, I'm pretty sure I can't offer her a sex life of the quality she's used to, I'm wildly unpredictable, highly volatile, unreliable, spend money like water, have absolutely no practical sense and I'm not even really that good looking. I'm like ET, you think at first I'm cute until you realise that actually I'm an ugly little thing with puny limbs and a sunken in chest.

I'm difficult to get close too, I'm evasive, I can be callous, I'm defensive, I'm dismissive.

And I'm quite brittle. REALLY brittle.

If I was a woman, you'd call me 'High Maintenance'.

I'm damaged goods. Unfortunately, I'm non refundable.



I have absolutely nothing to offer her. She deserves to be loved by someone worthy of her. And that is SO not me.

But love her I do.

And somewhere a part of me thinks that maybe, just maybe, I wouldn't make her life miserable.

Because I really do believe that she, and only she, can redeem me.

And tonight, she's more important than posting.