Thursday 22 March 2007

Not for Cats

I was talking to a girl who I seem to be entangled with last night and was a little disconcerted to find she fed her cat salmon.
First I just shook my head in stunned disbelief, but when it became clear that I was far from impressed she began to probe me as to my annoyment.
I explained to her that for a large section of this country- one of the richest in the world- salmon is considered a luxury. We won't even mention what people in Somalia would see it as. Bearing in mind that Whiskers, Kit eKat and people make perfectly good cat food, designed by cat experts for-er-cats. We don't have special human food designed scientists for humans (or if we do, we don't eat it), so the cat's got it good as it is. So it don't need no salmon.
Specially not when salmon is a luxury.

She still didn't see it. I, of course, have got a little irate, being up on my soapbox. Here goes;
'Have you ever heard of Nicolae Ceaucesceau? No?, well he was a Rumanian Dictator, on the other side of the Iron Curtain, killed in1989 when they overthrew the bugger. Christmas, and I can remember it, so surely you must. He was there over twenty years.
'Well this dude, he built the biggest palace ever built in the world [don't know if this is true], bigger then Versailles, this in a Marxist state, where appropriation by the oppressors is supposed to be a thing of the past. Anyway, him and his missus, they say, used to have five different meals cooked every night and have them brought in. They'd then choose one. Do you know who got the rest?
'The dogs. Their f***ing dogs. This in a country where the produce at the annual agriculture displays, to show off how great life in Soviet Rumania is, half of it is just painted wood, painted wood darling, because they ain't produced enough real food. That's how f***ed up it was, and while this is happening, Ilyena f***ing Ceaucesceau's dogs are eating enough food for four in the biggest palace in the world. Don't you think that's pretty messed up?'

She didn't get the parallel. Maybe there isn't one. Maybe I was just on my high horse again.

Let's just see if she buys salmon for the cat again...


Anonymous said...

heheh, well, comparing someone who feeds salmon to their cat with an evil, communist dictator is maybe going a bit far.

Anonymous said...

Well from a scientific point of view...

Cats must have added taurine in their diet. They cannot produce it so they must absorb it from their diet. If they don't have it in their diet it can cause irreparable kidney, heart and retina damage.

Further to that, not feeding cat food can cause a lack of some b group vitamins in cats, which can cause dietary complications. And there is something else really bad that I forgot about.

Its really bad but it is reversible.

Anonymous said...

She may as well feed salmon to the cat. Whether or not she does so, the starving of Somalia are unaffected.

I agree that there is something utterly decadent about doing so, but perhaps your reaction depends, or should depend, on whether she bought it for the cat, or whether she simply fed the cat some of what she had bought for herself?

If the former, well, decadent.
If the latter, then perhaps, she was being thrifty. Rather than 'waste' good money on cat food, why cannot the cat eat what madam is eating?

Anonymous said...

Hey man, you've sure got a way with women!

I'll bet she went all starry eyed when you got into the peasants eating painted wood, or whatever...

Anonymous said...

Onyx stone, Didn't want to go down that line, but yes, we ended up having very pasionate pre-pub sex ten minutes after my diatribe.

The oddest thing is the best early evening sex with this particular girl was the result of my explanation of Catholic theology on the seven deadly sins...
Go figure!!!
She's very good at starry eyed..

Bel, the fact remains that all resources have limits imposed by nature, including salmon, so yes what those who have do with what they have, affects those who have not. And yes, she BUYS the salmon for the cat.

Phishez, felids go blind if they do not have a reular meat source. Let me know when you remember your point, and I mean that.

David, you're right, I'm an opinionated loudmouth but if a girl wants to spend time with me, she needs to learn to think at a level different from the controlled norm...

Anonymous said...

I think its a bit expensive and a luxury to feed your cat salmon.

I wouldnt personally, but hey, Thats me.

Anonymous said...

She had better be good in bed Crush....cuz I just ain't seeing the connection between you two.
Didn't they hang them on the pamp posts for everyone to kick?????????? Maybe the dogs ate them thinking they were kebabs on a spit.

Anonymous said...

Duh, maybe I should read the comments first.
Personally I would save the cost of salmon and eat the bloody cat.