Free Love- When Sex Is No Longer Dirty

The last of my posts on the possibilities of life ahead is possibly going to be the most controversial- because it is going to turn traditional morals on its head.

I am going to come out and candidly say, that our morals on sex are largely a social construct, and one which will soon be overthrown and inverted.
In fact that process has already begun.

Firstly, lets actually have a look at what makes biological sense.
Monogamy doesn't.
Which is why so few successful species practice it.

It is Genetic foolishness for any reproductive individual to put all its eggs in one basket, so to speak and do all its breeding with the same individual.

This is not just true of males, it is true of females.
Producing offspring with as many different partners as possible, is the best choice your genes can make to be passed on.

So why do we practice Monogamy?
Why has so much human energy been expounded in stopping people having sex?

Firstly, because we are not designed perfectly. The nature of our reproductive organs- the fact they also pass waste- makes sex a hazardous business. It spreads disease.

Secondly, in a civilised culture, people need to know what to do with the property of people when they die.
Since the concept of giving it to his children semed fair, you have to be certain you know who all his children are.
So you have to know which women he had sex with, and be sure no other men have had sex with those women too.

If everyone is going to have an opportunity to have sex, this can only be so if the culture adopts monogamy.

It involves a huge repression of human instinct- but it serves a cultural purpose.
And to further prevent unnecessary disease, you stop ALL sex, that serves no reproductive purpose.

And over the years, a fair amount of male dignity has ended up getting attached to this.
Men took pride in the idea that 'their' woman was 'pure'.



Except of course today, with primogeniture largely a thing of the past, and DNA tests around to ensure we know whose child is whose, and with a better understanding of how veneral diseases are spread- even the chance at their eventual eradication-, with contraception to mean that sex need not lead to pregnancy, there is no compelling social reason to maintain these taboos.

Except male dignity.

Men still inherit a distaste for a woman with a past- whilst both sexes are locked into the idea that their partner having sex with another person is a humiliation for them, an attack on their dignity.

Or so it would appear.
In fact, the cracks are already appearing.

An increasing number of couples lead happy lives in situations where honesty, not fidelity is what keeps them together.
I know couples who live happily in open relationships, even one open marriage.

What is more significant, perhaps, is how many women of the younger generation are keen to advertise their promiscuity.
Because increasingly, it is becoming a selling point.

Men have always wanted easy sex.
A women who advertises that she wants easy sex, and has had plenty of it, is going to receive takers.
And not, as was once the case, just to use her.
Many men now, are in fact looking for a self confident, sexually liberated female, who they can initially have a good time with, and demands will not be made.

And in fact, it's a better way to find the perfect partner. Because it actually allows two people to find eachother emotionally, physically and spiritually.




An increasing number of men realise that if you really love someone, you don't need to own them, as long as they are always with you and always give you their love.
And if they give you as much of their love as you want, then it really doesn't matter how much they give to others.

Furthermore, if you REALLY loved someone, the idea of preventing them from fulfilling their sexuality, would be abhorrent.
In a situation of TRUE love, a man and a woman would express their love for eachother, by seeing the person they loved sexually fulfilled in whatever way the person they loved was fulfilled.

If a man truly loves a woman, he will care for her children, because they are hers, not because they are his.

The idea that promiscuity is a negative, that a promiscuous man is sleazy, or a promiscuous woman dirty belongs in the past.

Both in fact, are being generous with their love and affection.
Breaking the nasty limiting ideal of witholding your sexual desires for intimacy with- and your capacity to love- every member of humanity, bar one.

This nasty idea of owning the person you purport to love is not the real us.

Future generations will look at our ideals of chastity and virginity as comparable to slavery.
Which in a sense, they are.
Imposing on anybody the request that they preserve their love for YOU, and only YOU is thoroughly nasty, selfish and symptomatic of an inferiority complex.

Put bluntly, I don't think I'm bad looking, or bad in bed, probably a seven out of ten on both, but if I really loved a woman, I'd be flattered that she enjoyed the ten out of tens regularly, yet still gave me her love every night.

Because it would mean that what we had, was a REAL connection- a connection of mind and soul.

THAT would be a special woman.

The real point is love.
We should only have sex with those we love.

But that shouldn't mean that we have sex less.
It should make us love more.

Sex also serves a purpose, as a pwerful bonding mechanism- it draws people closer together, cementing the bonds of humanity.

The real Sexual Revolution, and the real Feminist Revolution will have taken place when the women held in most respect by society, are those our culture has taught us to most despise.
When we see them, not as sluts or whores, but as true Goddesses of Love.

When a woman feels pride, not shame, in a long list list of sexual conquests.

When a real man would not want a woman who could not love others too.

Thats what Free Love means- everyone being free to give their love, without fear of judgement.

Love should never be shackled.
Love should never be judged.

Again, we need to grow up.