Wednesday 12 December 2007

Santa- Some Suggestions

Because I reckon I've been a good boy...

But it's cold and the bed is too big.
And just every so often there are times when the sacrifice seems worth it.

Because everyone SHOULD be cuddled up to someone special this Christmas Eve. And Jesus, I'm really brooding on that.
That just ISN'T good.

One the whole the single lifestyle has a lot commend it, but right now it's the down sides I'm noticing.

Santa, isn't there some kind of bargain we can do?
I mean, could you bring her, but without the usual hassle women bring?
You know the wanting to take over your life stuff.

Because right now, it's pretty much high up on my mental list.


Anonymous said...

A nice suprise. Music Wednesday. Don't you think Rihanna looks like an alien? I'm just saying.

The mother ship has landed. ;D

Anonymous said...

Ah, Crushed, don't give in to the impulse to group women just because of a few sour grapes er I mean relationships. Funny thing relationships, it's not until you're in a really good one that you realize all the things that were so important are just sort of... meh.

I'm hoping santa sends you one, Crushed.

Anonymous said...

You want her, but you don't want her crap.

Tough. Its a trade off. How much of her you want is directly proportional to the amount of crap you have to put up with to get it.

Anonymous said...

Apparently you can get really life-like immitation women now. You put them in the micro-wave for a few minutes before going to bed.

You've been good, Ingsoc - but not THAT good !

Regardless, console yourself with this. You could have spent all your wages on housing her, feeding her and raising her children ... and STILL end up with the cold bum treatment on Christmas morning.

Please join the debate on my blog on the post about Bob Geldoff and nuclear power. I need you to explain how we get round the limited supplies of uranium.

Anonymous said...

I am buying you a PVC thong Mr Ingsoc...

Anonymous said...

*Chuckles* I like what phishez said. Yes, if you love her, you'll tolerate her crap (and, even further, which may be asking too much, but which I want to aim for; to find a guy who loves you enough that all the crap becomes good too... *Grins* Possible? ;-) OR at least, one with a sense of humour and enough maturity to shrug it off and indulge my foolishness a little... :-) )

Anonymous said...

A big job you've set for Santa.

But the right one won't be a hassle. She'll be perfect in your eyes and you will be in hers.

If not this year maybe next. I'm sure you'll have fun in the meantime.

Anonymous said...

Alexys- If Santa brought Rihanna, I doubt I'd get out of bed Xmas day.

If she is an Alien, then those Aliens are DEFINITELY a superior type to us...

Helen- Hey, I know that, it's just finding the right qualities. I guess I'm looking for different things to what a lot of people sem to want.

I'm hoping so too, Helen. Very much so :)

Phish- Yes, that sums it up. I don't want her barging in and disrupting my life. I want her closeness at night and her to listen to my political/philosophical/futuristic/radical/obscene/surreal diatribes.

I don't want her to call at me at work, read my blog/attempt to interfere with what I post/who I e-mail, ring me when I'm with mates, expect me to sacrifice time with mates, stop me going to the pub, ask me questions about who I'm with, want to get joint accounts, expect me take her to meet the parents, lecture me about smoking, drinking, other vices, etc.

That's the deal.

E-K- You describe the deal I seek to avoid.
I'll be over in a bit.

But I'll leave you a clue; think Gas Giants.

Mutley- Make sure it's black.

Eve- depends on her 'crap'. Sexual fidelity isn't something I particularly demand. If it's given, if not, I don't really care.
In that sense, I'm pretty tolerant.

jmb-'But the right one won't be a hassle. She'll be perfect in your eyes and you will be in hers.'

What a perfect summation. Yes, that sums up everything I've just said above.

But yes, The fun wll always be there, I'm sure That'll happen over the Xmas break.
Just not the magic night in question. Xmas eve. That's when you don't want to be alone.

Anonymous said...

That whole attitude will get you nowhere, Crushed ;). We can spot that fear a mile away!

Anonymous said...

Well, I'm cuddling up with my dog this Xmas. She is always pleased to see me, won't betray me and looks after me when I am ill. [You seen the doc yet, Crushed?]

Anonymous said...

I expect I will phone the samaritans sometime this xamas Mr Ingsoc...